Ready for your happy ever after? Moving in together is an exciting step, but it’s not the end of your love story. In many ways, it’s very much a beginning.
Talking about moving in
One of the best things you can do for yourselves as a couple is to communicate, and communicate often. Talking will help you work out if you share the same relationship goals, and it will help you see where your values are similar, and where they are different. Knowing your partner’s values – as well as your own – will help you to manage expectations about living together, and will make resolving any differences much easier.
Other crucial topics of conversation for couples moving in together are household chores and finances – including debt. Moving in together can improve your finances, but it might also make them more complex, too, so it’s worth considering things like shared bank accounts, mortgage payments and credit cards.
You might also want to learn more about how you both handle stress, and how much alone time you both need.
Communication is a skill that couples can learn and improve, and some people find couple’s counselling helpful. Try Relate for more information about the benefits of relationship counselling.
How much stuff will your partner bring when they move in?
When you combine two households, particularly if one of you is moving into the other’s established home, space may become an issue.
It’s not uncommon for couples to end up with duplicate items filling up their living space. Decluttering before the move will save you a lot of headaches.
Making shelf space for your new partner
Although streaming services and ebooks have reduced some people’s enthusiasm for owning and curating collections of media and books, it will pay to talk with your beloved about this, particularly if you have different tolerances for full shelves. If your partner is bringing the contents of 20m of bookshelf with them, and you only have 10m to spare, a decision needs to be made.
Could you build more shelves? A clever joiner can produce space out of thin air. Get recommendations for carpenters and joiners from friends who have had built-in shelving installed.
Another option is to reduce the amount of physical media you own, or the amount of physical media that you store in your home. External storage, for example, a storage unit, can help as you move in with a partner. Self-storage costs vary around the country, and the easiest way to work out how much it might be is to get quotes from a few different storage providers. Our blogpost on costing up self-storage has some guidance.
Handy sources of information for couples moving in together
Advicenow: this legal information charity provides free information, including guides for people who cohabit.
The housing advice charity Shelter can tell you more about housing and your rights.
Citizen’s Advice has information on everything from legal and property rights to benefits.
Gingerbread: the charity for single parenting has an article on moving in with a new partner.
